Week3: Reading Reflection

    For this week, I read the following three articles;

Dennen, V. P. (2014). Becoming a blogger: Trajectories, norms, and activities in a community of practice.

Links to an external site. Computers in Human Behavior, 36, 350-358. doi: http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2014.03.028

Lantz-Andersson, A., Lundin, M., & Selwyn, N. (2018). Twenty years of online teacher communities: A systematic review of formally-organized and informally-developed professional learning groupsLinks to an external site. Teaching and Teacher Education, 75, 302-315. doi:https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tate.2018.07.008

Ma, S. Q., & Leung, L. (2018). The impacts of personality traits, use intensity and features use of LinkedIn on bridging social capitalLinks to an external site.. Applied Research in Quality of Life, 1-20.

    I had my personal experiences to relate so much, to each of the articles. But here, I'd only like to share one since I think it will be the most interesting.

    So, I actually have a blog on a Korean portal website. It has been almost two years since I started running it. The reason for me to start blogging was the difficulty I had when preparing for a Ph.D. application in the U.S. I desperately wanted to study abroad and there were just so many things to prepare to do that. The information was never enough and I thought, if I cannot get enough, I can make it enough. So my blog is mainly about how an elementary school teacher prepared a Ph.D. application, went through the admission process, and currently doing as a Ph.D. student. But I also added other monthly posts about myself pole dancing, reading a book and reflecting on it, studying investment and making financial decisions (which weren't always wise), going somewhere nice, and eating something nice, all of which are not necessarily related to Ph.D. admission but that I wanted to record and remember. Moreover, I sometimes write a bit about my relationship, which dominates my head at the point of writing the post, only to get it straight and not worry about the same thing again. 

    I use a pseudonym (my high school nickname) and my blog title is literally translated to 'live hard'. I couldn't think of a better name because I knew my blog is not only about the Ph.D. application but a general journal of my life, focusing on specific aspects (i.e., pole dancing, reading, finance, etc.). I never specified where I live, what I study, how I look (all the uploaded pictures are mosaiced), or whom I interact with. But somehow people recognized me. There is a girl coming to our program this fall and she said that she knew me first from my blog (ALTHOUGH I NEVER SAID OR SHOWED THAT I AM AT FSU!). This month, my ex-boyfriend somehow found my blog and left a secret comment, clearly indicating he knows who I am in reality. What I want to note here is that I didn't appreciate either of them. I felt embarrassed, exposed, and worried. I wrote what was in my head in my blog, assuming none of my readers will recognize me in my real life. 

    According to Dennen (2014), I think my blog use is similar to those analyzed in the paper, especially Alyssa's. But the only difference between me and her is the perception of blogging, she perceived it as a communication and I did it as a showcase. I wanted to 'deliver the information about Ph.D. application' initially and that somehow applied to my other posts about different topics. So I was expecting my readers only to 'lurk', what I always do in online spaces. Would it be related to the personality, like Ma & Leung (2018) addressed? The reading this week really had me think a lot about how I perceive myself or want others to perceive me.